Sticks and Stones...

Tonight while surfing the web, I got a great idea for a blog.  One that has affected me my whole life.  And something that I haven't conquered - but is a work in progress.  You know the old saying, "Sticks and stones can break by bones but words will never hurt me?"  Well, that's false.  First of all, I have had my fair share of run ins with sticks and stones... from falling down hills, playing sports, you name it.  But, I can honestly say - that not one single stick or stone has broken a bone. Ever.  Maybe made a bruise, but nothing that I can even really remember.  I am just sure in the course of my life so far - it has had to happen.  

Words on the other hand, can break your heart.  Words are something that can only be forgiven - not forgotten.  You know, looking back on pictures - I can remember a lot of conversations - funny little things that I had previously forgotten.  But I remember those words.  And here in the age of social media - it seems so much more prevalent.  People can say anything they want to someone, because they don't have to look them in the eye.  My rule of thumb -- if I wouldn't say it if they are sitting in front of me - I will never type it.  And that goes in all areas  --  I've been hurt enough by words - I am sure we all have -- so I don't ever want to do that to anyone else.   There has been many times I have gotten upset - said things I don't mean - and had to apologize.  And then work hundreds of times harder - to show that person that I meant it.  Kids are a perfect example.  Even when you say, "You are grounded until you are 100!" -- well, we know that's not gonna happen.  So then, when I calm down, I have to explain that I was angry, that was dramatic, and here is the actual punishment.  You get what I am sayin', I'm sure. 

But here is something that I have learned... and I do it myself.  The word "whatever", "nothing", 'I'm fine"....   I do it.  I say it.  And I know its a joke that when a woman says, "Nothing is wrong.." - that means something is.  But honestly, isn't it sometimes so much easier to say those responses?  Like, it's easier to say that you don't care - than to explain all the reasons that you do.  And I know I feel that way sometimes.  And if I do, I am sure my kids do. 

So, here's my challenge for myself.  The next time someone I love says that - I am gonna make sure that they know I am available to listen - and I want to.  

Be kind to each other.  Life is too short. 

Oh for the love of.... INK!

Yep, you guessed it.  This post is about tattoos.  And the reason that I am writing it, is because of my adoring husband.  This week, my sweet sweet husband, got my name tattooed on his left arm.  And although some folks think it is insane, I'm sure, it's one of the sweetest things that anyone has ever done for me.  I know I am permanently on his heart, but anyone who looks at him, will see that.  Some people say it's bad luck, that's it's silly... but to one who has tattoos - it's a huge level of commitment that made me feel amazing.  He made me feel like the most beautiful person on this planet.  He makes me feel that way everyday, but it was just such a bold step - and something I never ever thought he'd do.

My mom is not a fan of tattoos, especially on her daughters.  And we both have them.  That being said, the only thing she has ever said is, "I don't know why you wanna do that.  I just don't get it."  But she has never been mean or ugly about it.  And I completely respect that she doesn't like them - but I respect her even more that she lets me know her opinion - but doesn't judge me for them.  But here is my theory on ink.  My tattoos commerate the most important people and things in my life.  Who I am and what I stand for.  It is something I look at in the mirror, and it reminds me of what is important.  I have a "Jesus Fish" on my shoulder with flowers.  Jesus is the center of my life, is the source of all beauty in my life, and Jesus always has my back.  I have an "Om" symbol - which is about recognizing our experiences as a reflection of the whole universe moves, the sun rising, the moon setting, the ebb and flow of waters, and the beating of our hearts.  Surrounding that, is my kids initials.  They are my world here on this earth.  My wrist has a cross, that me and Krissie got.  It was something we did together - because our bond will always be.  She helped through the worst times of my life, and celebrated the best times.  Then I have the tattoo of Shaun's.  It's a celtic cross, which was on his back, on his memorial service work, and his name.  Above that is the word "BeautifuLL".  He used to tell me that I am beautiful with two big L's.  Hence that tattoo.  Everytime I look at it I smile.  It reminds me of him - and the biggest learning experience of my life.  Albeit it was a horrible time, I grew more as a person, a mother, a daughter, and a friend.  I learned how much God loved.  How he allowed me to live through such a horrible time.

Then, I have "THE" tattoo.  And no, it's not the word "the".  It was my intent to get the chinese symbol for wisdom on my ankle, as a reminder to always walk in wisdom.  Well, after a most shocking pedicure, I learned that my "wisdom" tattoo, actually mean "year".  So, Wisdom went straight out the window on that one.  So, now that tattoo has changed it's meaning and I learned some stuff from it.  First, I am not chinese - I can't read it, and maybe should used google rather than trusting someone else to do it.  Second, I say now, it means "the year of Kristie"  - I mean, it is on ankle.  And third, it taught me to laugh.  I will never, ever, ever, ever forget the look on Krissie's face, sitting beside me in the pedi chair, and dude tells us what my tattoo means.  She googles it on her phone... and can't stop laughing.  I've never seen her laugh that hard.  So, in all my wisdom, I learned to laugh at myself.  Because even if I try to be deep - it just might be hilarious.

This is the guy who informed me what my tattoo meant...LOLOL!

So, there's the story.  And what's on my brain.  And remember, tattooed people love you - even if you don't have a tattoo!

Motivated... or maybe not....

I had one of those days at work... You know the type of day.... When you leave you feel completely sucked of all motivation.  So, being a googler (if that's even a word) - I decided to google something motivating.  And what I found was hilarious.  Well, hilarious in a sick and twisted way.  So here is just a snippet of my brain right now.

Most every article I looked at said, "Do you have ADD?" or... "Feel unmotivated? Reward yourself!".  And here is what I am thinking.  Many people I know have ADD or ADHD.  And motivation isn't a problem.  I find it almost insulting to people with that diagnosis being labeled as unmotivated.  

Second, and maybe the saddest, is "Reward yourself."  Maybe I am being cynical.  Maybe I am in a mood.  But really?  Maybe that's part of the problem.  Maybe we have become so accustomed to getting something for nothing - for just doing what we should do - that we have become unmotivated to do anything.  That's just sad.  

I felt like everything that I read what excusing it.  So, here's my thoughts.  Feeling unmotivated?  Get up and do it anyway.  You will be glad you did. 

So, my being unmotivated just motivated me.  That's ironic.  I wanna be motivated just to be a functioning member of society and doing my part.  Maybe my being unmotivated was a moment of laziness.  I will probably unmotivated again, but at least I wrote a blog about it - that took some effort, right?